What is the cycle of violence?
The cycle of violence holds that domestic abuse is not a single event but repeats through tension building, an acute violent incident and apology and reconciliation, often with shorter cycles and greater severity over time. American psychologist Lenore Walker proposed it in *The Battered Woman* (1979), drawing on interviews with survivors.
- Phase 1
- Tension building
- Phase 2
- Acute violence
- Phase 3
- Reconciliation ("honeymoon")
- Trend
- Often faster and more severe
The three phases
| Phase | Abuser | Victim |
|---|---|---|
| Tension | Irritation, blame, control | Walking on eggshells |
| Explosion | Physical, verbal or sexual violence | Fear, injury |
| Reconciliation | Apologies, promises | Hope, forgiveness |
The warmth of the reconciliation phase sustains hope that "this time will be different."
"He's a good person most of the time." Survivors often say this. The apology after violence may be sincere, but it is still part of the cycle. Recognizing the cycle is the first step out.
Why leaving is hard
Walker linked repeated abuse to learned helplessness. Financial dependence, children, fear of retaliation and social blame also matter, and danger can rise when a victim tries to leave, so safety planning is vital.
Intergenerational transmission
Cathy Spatz Widom (1989) reported in *Science* that people abused or neglected as children were more likely than matched controls to be arrested for violent crime, while stressing that most did not become violent. See adverse childhood experiences and dysfunctional families.
Law in East Asia
Korea enacted its Act on Special Cases Concerning the Punishment of Domestic Violence in 1997 (in force 1998). Japan's Spousal Violence Prevention Act dates from 2001, and a 2023 amendment in force from April 1, 2024 extended protection orders to threats against freedom, reputation or property when serious mental or physical harm is likely. China's Anti-Domestic Violence Law took effect on March 1, 2016.
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Criticisms
Not all abuse follows three phases; many relationships involve ongoing coercive control without a honeymoon, so attention today extends beyond physical violence.
Frequently asked questions
- What is the honeymoon phase?
- The period after violence when the abuser apologizes, is kind and promises it won't happen again.
- Do abused children always become abusers?
- No. Risk rises, but most do not.
- Does it apply to dating violence?
- Yes, the same cycle often appears.
References
- Walker, L. E. (1979). The battered woman. Harper & Row.
- Widom, C. S. (1989). The cycle of violence. Science, 244(4901), 160–166.
- 가정폭력범죄의 처벌 등에 관한 특례법 (1997. 12. 13. 제정, 1998. 7. 1. 시행).
- 配偶者からの暴力の防止及び被害者の保護等に関する法律（平成13年法律第31号）、令和5年改正（2024年4月1日施行）.
- 中华人民共和国反家庭暴力法（2015年12月27日通过，2016年3月1日起施行）.